The death of Whitney Houston has once again brought up the comments from people like
"Why all the hoopla for a drug addict?"
"why idolize someone who was clearly a bad example ect"
Well because none of us are the sum of just one area of who we are. Whitney was a person given an extreme gift,actually many gifts. A beautiful voice,a beautiful face , statuesque body, a loving family that supported her talents. Why would someone with sooo much blessed to her have such a hard time staying clean? It is a mystery.
Addiction is based on many complex situations within a person. I have lived with people with alcohol addiction and it plainly ruins love and lives . As do many other addictions.
My father was clearly a food addict. Most of his life revolved around food. Food is the center of most peoples gatherings and entertainment.My father would already be thinking about where he would eat lunch pretty much right after breakfast. He was Italian and brought up with a high carb diet. Italians LOVE to feed people . They take joy in the pure ecstasy of eating with others. Eventually my father developed type 2 diabetes and also had to have a triple by pass and mitro valve replacement for his clogged arteries. His eating habits killed him at age 79 and he honestly was very fortunate to have lasted that long with the toll his heart had taken. Was his food addiction his fault? He clearly was raised with those attitudes toward food implanted in his brain. And as he became an adult food became where he went for comfort.Many of my memories of him revolve around eating and where we went to eat. It is telling that my daughter ofetn refered to him as "grandpa donut".
Other people turn to sugar or hoarding or starving or a slew of other behaviours that are harmful to them and are all forms of addiction or disorders.
I have recently been faced with some health issues that have caused me to make two very radical changes in my diet. Eat low sodium 1500 mg and no Gluten. I am finding how hard is is to do both. Last weekend I "fell off the wagon" basically it was my birthday weekend . Both Friday and Saturday I went well over my recommended sodium intake. I paid dearly for about 5 days. I was SICK,my ears were ringing like crazy,the fluid level came back up in my head and i had a small bout of vertigo again. It took five days for me to get my body leveled back out. It was my birthday and hey I felt I could "get away with it" How is this any different than an alcoholic taking a drink on the weekend and going on a binge? Maybe the difference is that what I did "mostly" affects just me. It did take me away from work one day and I mostly felt like crap all week and maybe it affected my mood somewhat.
Other addictions can result in very destructive behaviour towards others and that is what makes those types of addictions all the more obvious to everyone else. Many people are functioning alcoholics. They continue to work and be productive and really no one thinks much of it unless it starts to take a toll on their health or affects the people that live with that person.
Addictions of any type can be destructive. The key is to try to find a balance in life. If you are doing something too often that can damage your health or your relationship with those you love than you need to try to change what you are doing.
Am I going to throw caution to the wind and disregard my diet for a special occasion again? I might,but I will also know it can come at a very high price to my health. I have some pretty good self control,but I am human just like anyone else.
That is why I choose not to judge anyone,even Whitney,who just could not seem to stay on track. Even having a beautiful daughter and people around her who clearly loved her. I feel sad and it is such a waste for her to have passed so young.
Why can some do it and others can't? All I know is I clearly want to be here for my family and my soon to be Grandson. I want to enjoy many years with them and when it is time for me to leave this world it WILL NOT be because I didn't try hard to take care of my body and my attitude toward others.
This was so beautiful, thought-evoking and personal. Thank you for taking the time to share. Addicts are almost always pegged as weak horrible people, which is not generally the case. People use as a means to escape themselves, they generally feel to be useless and are oblivious to their beauty, talent and often feel as though they don't deserve the love given them. How sad. She was a treasure gifted with talent, beauty and indefatiguable work ethic. The loss of her will reverberate for a long time. May she now rest in the peace she never could find in life.
ReplyDeletethe best thing we can give our children is good self esteam. Make them feel worthy and loved. That is the best ammunition we can give them to avoid looking to bad choices to fill emptyness inside them.
ReplyDeleteThis is very true. Some people see addiction as only drug and alcohol addiction. After a lecture on hoarding at the University it is very obvious addition comes in many forms: Food, drugs, alcohol, possessions, working- out, diet pills, work..the list goes on and on. The constant struggle is for balance and emotional fulfillment. All of these are ways of filling an emotional hole..and we all have them, but not all of us also have the biological bend towards addiction- put the two together and it can be the perfect storm. I wish people would view addicts similarly to those with other medical conditions, because that's what it really is. I tend to have an addictive personality too and food has been my biggest struggle. But, I think if an addict realizes they have this problem and constantly tries to overcome it, even if they fail, they are doing the best they can.
ReplyDeleteDoing the best we can is really all that we can do. So true.
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